If you had a flat tire or any kind of car trouble a truck driver was a welcome sight pulling up in front of you. Jokerz has a huge collection of funny drinking jokes. After a year or so the old man decided to try once more so he goes down the mountain, into the bar and asks if they have any women. The driver s wife says, oh you old fool you are always driving too fast. Suddenly, he veers to avoid an accident, and the load. He said, i want three flat tires, a pair of headlights and pair of running boards. Then, this big troublemaking truck driver steps next to him, takes the drink from the guy, and just drinks it all down. A german truck driver is sitting in a liverpool bar mouthing off about how lazy the british are. The bartender said, no, just big joe, so the man said, i aint like that and again stormed out. So the bartender says all right, what kind of gin would you like. Jokes top 100 funny blog marriage jokes seniors jokes geek jokes good jokes one liners hilarious jokes sarcasm black humor dad jokes fun facts chuck norris jokes corny jokes funny riddles and answers kids jokes funny quotes best puns little johnny jokes cute jokes redneck jokes knock knock clean jokes funny sayings dry jokes bad jokes shower. Trucking jokes page 36 truckingboards truck drivers forum. Well, there is a statue of a naked man in there, and his most private parts are covered only by a fig leaf.
The bartender obliges and pours him another whiskey. Excuse me, says the bartender, i cant help but notice that youre obviously fabulously wealthy and irresistible to women, but you have an orange for a head. The bartender is in shock, but finally asks the dinosaur his story. The bartender, without saying a word, pulls out a shotgun and blows the guy away. With the rise of selfdriving vehicles, its only a matter of time before we get a country song where a guys truck leaves him too. The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. Truck drivers today are no longer the knights of the road as they once were termed. This truck driver hauling a tractortrailer load of computers stops for a beer. Since trucking is a very important job, there is a lot of attention dragged to the trucking industry as well. He bangs on the bar with his paw and demands a beer. The truck driver says, no, i was delivering this bridge and ran out of gas. The computer nerds are in season because they are overpopulating silicon valley. You need to make adjustments so the car is comfortable for you, the driver, i began. From the county where drunk driving is considered a sport, comes this absolutely true story.
The brand new blonde waitress, not wanting to appear stupid, went to the kitchen and said to the cook, this guy out there just ordered three flat. Trucking jokes page 4 truckingboards truck drivers forum. A motorist was mailed a picture of his car speeding through an automated radar. The truck driver replied, if you can take these penguins to the zoo while i wait for aaa that will be great. The drunkard and the coffee shop owner bar jokes and. Waiting in the car, my wife doesnt want the driver to know that the house will be empty for the night. Nov 11, 2015 waiting in the car, my wife doesnt want the driver to know that the house will be empty for the night. My truck is way too low said by no minitruck ever funny meme image. The bartender replied, i really dont think you should. As she slid behind the wheel for her first driving lesson, my daughter couldnt contain her excitement. Right as the truck driver is starting to get in good with her, his company sends him on a week long job, but before he leaves he brings sara 7 apples. If quitters never win, and winners never quit, what fool came up with, quit.
A man was driving along the road when all of a sudden he has to swerve to avoid a box falling off the lorry in front. Stupid truck driver hamburgerhelper electrical 15 sep 17. The bartender approaches and says, we dont serve beer to bears in bars in billings. Enraged now, the truck driver screams, youre crazy. Oh look a penny funny truck meme image for whatsapp. When he did, the driver got out of his truck and pulled a piece of chalk from his pocket. A piece of string walked into a bar and said gimme a beer.
Have a trucker joke you want to share with your fellow truck drivers. Here are some hilarious redneck fails including atv fails, a pig on a diet and some good down. Please note that not all of these videos featuring bad driving resulted in accidents, though that is the most typical outcome. He sits at the bar and orders a beer, the bartender is a bit surprised to see the trucker. Tell these to your spouse, your fellow team driver, or your dog. The man agreed and the penguins hopped into the back. Fonts that really cool guy from the show, happy days. Philosophical jokes burr cooks history and genealogy site.
So, she explains to the driver that i will be out soon, hes just going upstairs to say goodbye to my mother. Trucker jokes funny truck drivers jokes trucker humor. I get a cab home, and when i get there, i remember i left my wallet and credit cards in my desk at work. The man agreed and the penguins hopped into the back of his car. The truck driver quietly sat there eating his steak. Some of the best truck driver quotes are about the industry, some were taken from movies or books, and others came from real life truckers. As the gang entered the restraunt, everyone but the truck driver quickly paid thier bills and left. A driver tucked this note under the windshield wiper find more jokes. Car memes, car humor, truck memes, trucker quotes, funny jokes, hilarious. A man was driving and saw a truck stalled on the side of the highway that had ten penguins standing next to it. Ron just got a new sports car and was out for a drive when he cut off a truck driver. Get a glimpse of tow truck driver humor with these funny. A swift driver walks over and says what is wrong jb.
See more ideas about jokes, big trucks and truck memes. Today that sight would cast fear in the most brave of hearts since there have been so many murders committed by truck drivers. The bartender says you cant bring that dog in here. Comments off on the smart blonde and the trucker joke of the day, truck driver jokes july 27th, 2010 jokes a trucker came into a truck stop cafe and placed his order.
Kidney 592010 a man walking along the beach one day finds a bottle. A doctor and a truck driver are both in love with a very beautiful woman named sara and the competition is fierce. If you and your friends have done these things, youre probably a redneck. The woman sitting next to me is blonde and a professional weight lifter. Drunk jokes funny drunk jokes funny drinking jokes jokerz. Im a 6foot tall, 175pound blonde woman with a black belt in karate. Haha funny us trailer would love to sell used tr car jokes. The irate driver says, youre nuts, i wasnt speeding.
See more ideas about truck driver, humor, trucking humor. The trucker said you mean theres more than one kind of gin. Mack trucks when you really gotta haul buns funny meme image. Suddenly the truck driver saw a lawyer walking down the road and instinctively he swerved to hit him. Suddenly, he veers to avoid an accident, and the load shifts. See more ideas about jokes, funny stories and funny jokes. Two hours later, the trucker was back on the road again and decided to check on the penguins. So here are a few clean trucking jokes to help you keep moving. See top 10 driving jokes from collection of 57 jokes rated by visitors. The difference between a good driver and a bad driver is about 35 years too many on the road.
Big mutha truckers 2 is a game for playstation 2 and xbox. Unfortunately, the bartender does not hear him, because he went deaf in one ear as a child. As he approaches the bar, he sees a big sign on the door saying nerds not allowed enter at your own risk. He asked the driver to stop, but the driver said, if you have to go so bad, stick your ass out the window and poo. No time to explain get in the truck funny meme picture. A truck driver stopped for a meal at and was just served when a huge caravan of hells angels roared in. All feature hillbillies and many feature the demon drink. After drinking, the man starts walking out of the bar.
About us contact us user feedback contest advertise welcome link to us. Nonsense, said the nun, ill just look the other way. Truck driver hauling a tractortrailer load of computers find more jokes in. A bear walks into a bar in billings, montana and sits down. The drivers wife says, oh you old fool you are always driving too fast.
As the truck was speeding, his shit sprayed onto the two people walking along the road. A mexican, a cuban, and a chinese guy are riding in a truck. So i come to this bar, and just when im thinking about ending it all, you show up and drink my poison. As he approaches the bar, he sees a big sign on the door saying. Some people say theres no such thing as a stupid question, but those people have never been asked about the gluten content of a margarita. The second one drank the truckers coffee, and the third wolfed down his apple pie. The bartender, now furious at the guys general stupidity, yells, for crying out loud, just measure the stupid horses. The game is about passing challenges with an 18wheeler while attacked by ufos and cops. I searched for, and found, the best youtube videos of stupid drivers. The happy priest climbed into the passenger seat and the truck driver continued down the road. One grabbed the truckers cheeseburger and took a huge bite from it. Excuse me, i know this is going to sound strange, but do you.
Nov 28, 2010 6 the driver behind you is always the one you punted last week. But then he remembered there was a priest in the truck with him, so at the last minute he swerved back away, narrowly missing the lawyer. The swift driver says well when you get up to the scale cut your lights off and coast on by. Hundreds of jokes posted each day, and some of them arent even reposts.
So the string left, but he was thirsty, and he really wanted a beer, so he messed up his hair real badly and looped himself around until he had tied himself into a knot. He turns around and she is doubled over with tears running down her cheeks. Stupid truck drivers compilations 2018 these truck. The man pulled over and asked the truck driver if he needed any help.
So the truck driver finishes his beer, gets back in his truck, and heads for the freeway. Trucking jokes to keep you moving tetra capital blog. He says i drive my truck from hamburg to liverpool via hollandbelgium over to the uk and up to liverpool, drops his load off and back to hamburg in under 2 days. Edit past tense of eat wherd that leftover possum belly go. Racing jokes and sayings bob hilbert sportswear dirt racing. The bear, becoming angry, demands again that he be served a beer.
The dinosaur sniffed, took a sip from his straw, and said my whole family was on that truck. A truck driver who had been delivering radioactive waste for the local reactor begins. The fellow cannot believe what the bartender has said and storms out of the bar. We are just passing the biggest pub in dublin, said the driver. A truck driver stopped at a roadside diner for lunch and ordered a cheeseburger, coffee and a slice of apple pie. Well here are some best truck driver quotes you might have heard or might not have.
The bartender is not a man to pry, but he feels compelled to ask about this mans life. Comment below, and well add the best ones to the list. There was this guy at a bar, just looking at his drink. The jb driver replies i am 2,500 lbs over gross and i only have to go 5 miles with it and there is a scale on the way.
The truck driver says, come on man, i was just joking. Recently a routine police patrol parked outside a bar in paris, tennessee. See more ideas about truck memes, trucker quotes and funny. This refrigeration truck driver goes into the bar and he asks the bartender id like to have a shot of gin. Find jokes funny videos funny pictures funny comics submit jokes latest jokes fortune cookies. Dirty jokes celebrity jokes lawyer jokes political jokes religious jokes tasteless jokes bar jokes. Not to worry, the nerds are overpopulating silicon valley and are in season now. You go right up there and tell him off go ahead, ill hold your monkey for you. The driver found him, freaked out, and crashed trying to squash my dear hubby. Internet where her fish were when she caught em in er net. The bartender says, okay, truck drivers are not nerds, and serves him a beer. The bartender is a blonde girl with a baseball bat.
So, the bartender showed the nun the door at the top of the stairs, and she preceded to the. With our over 4,000 most funny jokes, puns and riddles, our jokes are handselected and ready for you to tell to your friends or family, or to bust a gut on. World dangerous idiots bulldozer heavy equipment operator skill fastest working bulldozer driving duration. See more ideas about funny truck quotes, truck quotes and trucker quotes. The lady to your right is blonde and a professional wrestler. As he is sipping his beer, a skinny guy walks in with tape around his glasses, a pocket protector with twelve kinds of pens and pencils, and a belt at least a foot too long.
The bartender thinks to himself, the man cant be stupid enough to pull the same trick twice, tonight he must have enough money, and gives beer to everyone. The brand new blonde waitress, not wanting to appear stupid, went to the kitchen and said to the cook, this guy out there just ordered three flat tires, a pair of headlights and a pair of running boards. We have a great collection with the best driver jokes at. Best trucker jokes truck driver jokes and humor jokesfest. Oh man, the bartender says, im sorry, here, the first ones on me. The truck driver says, i drive a truck, and the smell is just from the computers i am hauling. To the mathematicians who thought of the idea of zero, thanks for nothing. The best humor is more personal, such as hearing trucker jokes to help liven up the trip. The 17 stupidest questions you can ask a bartender thrillist. Tennessee hillbilly jokes jokes funny jokes clean jokes. They provide many helpful services for drivers, including emergency roadside assistance, vehicle recovery stuck in a ditch, mud, or. If you want to describe someones drunk behavior then read our drunk jokes and funny drunk jokes. The guy, without missing a beat, says this is my seeingeye dog.
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